Hypocrisy

Look at the clock – it’s almost nine!
What were you thinking staying out till this time?
What are you wearing?
Where had you gone?
And why are you so late?
Your skirt is too short –
cover up your legs!
I’m sure you’ve attracted all the wrong sorts of attention
People on the streets
lurking late at night
Don’t trust the cabbie
Don’t talk to strangers
Pull up your top-
Your cleavage shows!
Don’t buy tight tops
or tight jeans
tight clothes
tight tight – your body shows
And all the men will look at you
and they might come to rape you
But ofcourse
they won’t rape you or even look at you
If the shape of your body is all covered up
Because then they won’t know
You have what they want.
Live in fear.
Every time you step out, or talk to someone
Have that fear.
Home is where you are safest.
Because home is where you can trust.
Because we, elders, know it all.
Always listen to us,
Because we know
how the world works
We are always right because we are older
You do not know
the things that happen nowadays
You are young
and therefore unwise, foolish even.

– Oh, but what if I told you
I knew?
What if I told you
I knew that the devil
does not wear his name on his sleeve
He hides behind the mask of a trusted face
What if I told you
I have faced what you tell me to fear?
And I have known that fear
perhaps better than you?
And what if I told you that
sometimes strangers are not strange
but familiar
That home is not always
where I am safest
And that trust is a thing
so broken, battered, abused
it is on-existent almost?
But there are things I don’t know
for instance –
How can you look me in the eye,
flawed as you are,
wrongs that you have done,
lies that you’ve covered,
secrets that you’ve kept,
and judge ME
in a way that you would never dare judge yourself?
How do you pretend?
How do you live?
But I guess loyalty and courage
integrity and honesty
mean little in the “adult” world
where putting up a facade
of piety and purity
while practising all that you preach against
Is the only twisted truth there is.

And I will strive everyday of my life
as the years go by and I am myself an ‘elder’
to never, never, never become a hypocrite
Like you.

Post script: This is more like a stream of consciousness kind of thing, more than a proper poem. I don’t really write too much poetry. If the poem sounds bitter – it is.

To all the Good Guys.

This is a letter.

To all the Good Guys,

Hi. 😀 I hope you’re having a great day! I had a pretty okay day – and there’s something that happened today that really got me thinking about you all. The Good Guys.

So I was out this morning, doing some quick shopping, and I was alone. Also, today was a festival day (Ganesh pooja) and so the streets were pretty empty – deserted almost. I had finished all my shopping, and I was standing by the side of the road, trying to flag down an auto to get back home when I noticed a white SUV stop a little ahead of me. I didn’t pay much attention to it.

That’s when the SUV started driving beside me, slowly, and then stopped right next to me. The driver was a man who was – well, I don’t know, in his forties? But definitely not younger. He had heard me quarelling with the one auto that was around there because I refused to pay double the price to go home. He was smiling at me, and then he said,” I’m going there too, I’ll drop you, get in.” I was pretty taken aback. I didn’t even know this guy at all, he was a total stranger. And I don’t know how it is in any other part of the world, but stuff like this isn’t really common in Bangalore. It isn’t safe at all, in fact. I obviously refused his offer. Once, twice, three times. But he still persisted, saying it was completely alright, he was going the same way, he could drop me. Then he leaned over and opened the door of the car. “It’s really alright, get in, I’ll drop you!”

I was alone on that road, there were hardly any autos, and it was getting really hot. I really wanted a free ride home. And the guy looked, well, genuine.

But if there’s one thing I’ve learnt in life, it is to never ever trust anybody easily. Especially not some man I’ve never seen before in my life offering to drop me home in his dark-tinted SUV in a deserted road. So I shook my head for the thousandth time, smiling to be polite, and I shut the door he had opened, and said, “Thank you, but there’s no need, really.” He shook his head, smiled at me a bit and drove off finally.

As I walked down the road to the main road, hoping to find more autos there, I wondered – what if he was actually a nice man, offering to drop me home, because he knew it was pooja day, and I was alone and it’d be difficult for me to get an auto home? What if he was religious, and thought that it was an auspicious day and he should do something good for someone else for a change? What if I had accepted his offer? But as I was thinking these things, I could hear the voices in my head – of my aunt, my mom, my uncle everyone saying “How could you be so stupid?” “With what sense did you get into his car?” Because there was a very real chance that he could have had some not so noble motives in offering to drop me after all. What if he had tried to take advantage of me? Or taken me someplace else and done who knows what to me? Ugh, I hated to think that way, but I had to.

But then again, what if he was one of you – the Good Guys. It isn’t fair for you all. And I’d like to apologize on behalf of all the other women who have done such things – very simple things – just because they are too afraid to trust you. We’ve been conditioned that way – and it’s horrible. I hate it. I hate to have to think about your motives and question your morality and hear the voices of my whole family in my head and fight an internal battle before responding to you. This isn’t the first time I’ve been offered to be dropped home by a stranger, but it was the first time the guy was so persistent. He realized why I was being so cautious and what I was thinking about him, and that’s why he went on repeating “It’s alright.” It was pretty awkward.

So that’s why I decided to write this letter – and it’s really long, so I’m sorry – to all you Good Guys, because it really isn’t fair to you. You should be able to go up to a girl at the bar and tell her you think she’s good-looking, and ask for her number without her having to judge you and question your motives. And when you accidentally fall on/bump into a girl, you shouldn’t be given scathing looks -because hey, it was a genuine mistake! And when you decide to go out of your way and help out a girl because she’s alone, or it’s late, or she just needs help basically, you shouldn’t be denied, that too so obviously because of what she thinks you could be. But the day that happens, is the day we know that the Bad Guys are losing. And trust me, that’s a world I’ve been dreaming of since forever.

So here’s some love -from every girl who’s ever felt this way –

And I hope you had a nice day. 🙂 Bye then!

Sincerely,

A Girl who really Wanted that Free Ride.

Questions on Creation.

Forgive me, for I have been so embarrassingly inactive on WordPress for the last couple (or more) months. I can give no other excuses apart from the most used one of them all – I had no time. Well, ofcourse I had time to squeeze in a blog post – but about what? That’s what I didn’t have time for. My brain was already so cramped with all these things in there fighting for attention – my exams, applying for a master’s next year, what I should do in life, my internship, my credit courses, well, it would suffice to say my brain was so full of things there was hardly any space for a creative article idea to pop up, that was good enough to write about.

But excuses are excuses, and I apologize. Here’s a cute puppy gif to make up for it :

Today I realized that I owe it to myself to just let it all go for a while, and  just blog a bit. So I’ve decided to write about a new revelation I’ve had – about myself.

Ever since I could remember – I’ve had questions about religion. I realized I never felt the same way about it as other people. I grew up in a Hindu family, went to a largely Hindu populated school and am now in a Christian college and I have friends who practice many different religions. But I have always had my questions about God, and for the longest time, I even feared God. I would pray every day – I would actually start my day with a prayer. And every time I passed by a temple, I would raise my hands to my lips and then to my chest and mutter a small prayer. I wouldn’t go into the Prayer room or the kitchen when I had my periods, because I was told not to. Oh, there were a hundred other things I would do, that hundreds of other people also did – and I’m sure it made sense to them, but to me, it didn’t.

And one day, a few months back, I thought about why exactly I still practiced a religion if I didn’t believe in the customs and the rituals. I didn’t even believe in the God that my religion told me about. Now let me make myself clear – I do believe that there could be a God, but just not the way my religion (or any other religion) described God. Firstly, I thought it mighty presumptuous of the Human race to think that God looks like us. That He has a gender and that that gender is a He mostly, not a She. And coming from a country like India – where you can see people throwing out pumpkins and rice grains and coconuts that were perfectly edible out on the streets after using them for poojas and rituals and pouring down tonnes of milk on stone statues when there are thousands of people who go hungry and beg on the streets for food – I really couldn’t see the justice in it.

And so I have converted, officially, and I am a Hindu no more. Neither am I a Christian or a Buddhist or a Muslim – I just have too many bones to pick with religion as such. For something that preaches peace and love and equality, it is the main cause of one too many wars and deaths around the world for me to look up to it. I did my research, and I looked things up on the internet, and I realized that what I identified myself with the most was Agnosticism. I was an Agnostic all along, I was just too young to realize. I do believe that there could be a God (although, if in the future strong scientific evidence is found that God does not exist, I would be okay with that too), but I do not think it is within our abilities to fully understand and know such a force (much less spend billions and billions on it and fight wars in it’s name and divide humanity into different groups that believe different things rather than unite them for one cause and for peace). I do not commit myself to any religion, because I do not believe in it.

I know there are lots of people who will have their issues with what I believe in – but they are entitled to have their opinion, as am I. But I also know of a few others who believe the same things I believe in, and this gives me comfort.

Well, I’m glad that’s out into the world now.

My Music List.

So this post was going to be about something else, but I have been side tracked and this post is now about this video I just spent 30 minutes on :

Yes. The Best Blind Auditions of The Voice USA of All Time.

I don’t know how this video happened to pop up in my recommended videos list on YouTube, because I don’t even watch The Voice, but I’m SO GLAD it did. And can I just say -it isn’t even funny how wonderfully amazing listening to all of their voices made me feel.

It wasn’t even real after a while anymore, I was just drowning in the music, and in their voices – and it really made me feel the power of what music can do to you. I know it’s a pretty long video, but if you’re a music person, and even if you’re not, I think you should watch it.

Every singer brought a different feel, a different aura with his/her voice and style and it was just an absolute delight to watch them, and listen to them. It just reinforced the fact that music is such a beautiful, beautiful form of expression, and you only need to hear a little bit to feel and understand an ocean of emotions. I think I was just clutching my heart for the entire video, because it just made me so happy to hear them, and to see that their music was being appreciated, because it was so magical!

You get to know so much more about a person just from the kind of music they listen to. I always, always prefer to listen to music only through headphones or ear phones and not out loud, because I feel it’s such a personal thing (unless I’m at a party or a concert or some such event). But just because I feel like sharing this right now, here’s a list of the songs I’m currently into (in no particular order).

1) This Is What Makes Us Girls – Lana Del Rey

Lana Del Rey has, hands down, the most ethereal, haunting, drama queen voice, and there’s no one quite like her. This one is my favourite, especially because of the music interlude towards the end. I’m sure I’m never going to get over this song.

2) Smooth Operator – Sade

Because.

3) Careless Whisper – George Michael

I’ve been going through a jazz phase, okay? Also, I love this song. Who doesn’t?

4) Flosstradamus – Rebound (Daktyl Remix)

I can listen to this on loop. Love it.

5) Pani da Rang – Ayushman Khurana

The guitar. His voice. Enough said.

6) Tum hi ho – Arijith Singh

Although I listen to this song very rarely now, there was a time when it was on loop (for literally everybody) and it made me (and everyone else) fall completely in LOVE with the magic that is Arijith Singh’s voice. He sounds like an angel from heaven.

7) I Was Here – Beyonce

After having controlled the urge to put at least fifty other songs by Queen B in my list, I have restricted myself to this one purely because it gives me goosebumps every single time I listen to it. It’s just beautiful, how she sings it. And this video is just perfect.

8) Love On top – Beyonce

Okay, I lied. I put another one of hers on the list. This is my happy song. I simply love it.

9) Blue Ocean Floor – Justin Timberlake

I LOVE Justin Timberlake; I love his voice, I love his face, I love the way he dances, I love that his songs are almost eight minutes long because he puts so much detail into his music and I love him. He’s one of my top five favourites. And I have a seperate list of just his songs that I love, but for now this one shall suffice because it is be-yoo-ti-ful. (Also, I love Strawberry Bubblegum).

10) Unakkenna Venum Sollu – Benny Dayal and Mahathi

It’s a Tamil song, because why not? Such a beautiful song, it reminds me of why Chennai will always feel like home to me.

So that’s my very weird list of songs – they aren’t my top favourites, but I do feel connected to them in some ways. And thank you, if you’ve had the patience to go through the whole list, maybe tell me what your favourite songs are?

Basically, what I’m trying to say is, there’s some kind of magic in music, and we all feel it, and I think it’s what keeps the world together. 🙂

Winter Palace in the Summer Heat.

Despite having spent twelve years of my life here in Chennai, I don’t really know that much about the food scene here, like I do about Bangalore. That’s because I never really went out and explored -but now that I’m here during my holidays, with tons of free time, I got the chance to go to some places.

This afternoon, I went to a small, not very well-known cafe/restaurant called ‘Winter Palace’ with my best friend (whose mother recommended it to us). I found it rather funny that any restaurant dared to call themselves “Winter Palace” in such a blisteringly hot place like Chennai, that too when they had only outdoor seating!  But I found that on the whole, I quite liked the place a lot.

The cold and refreshing Sangria mocktail.

The Winter Palace is inside the Russian Cultural Centre, and therefore, obviously, it serves Russian food. This I found very exciting, because it is the first place I’ve ever heard of that serves Russian cuisine, which I have never tasted before. I’m not too sure how authentic it was (because here in India, everybody Indianises almost everything) but it seemed pretty authentic, and very yummy too!

Russian dumplings with mashed potato and mushroom filling, and sour cream.

The whole place was done up in a pleasant sky blue and white, with pretty white lace curtains. Although today was a hot day, sitting here was quite nice, because it was well shaded and there was lots of breeze (also, the staff made sure the fans were all adjusted right). The menu had a lot of unpronounceable dishes (for someone like me, who doesn’t know Russian), but with descriptions of the dish given below. Along with vegetarian options, they also served fish, chicken, lamb and beef.

Tomato soup and the dish of Russian dumplings.

We ordered a “Krasnodar” soup, which is a thick, refreshing, cold tomato soup (they have choices of hot and cold soups). It had an extremely strong raw tomato flavour, and since I’m not a fan of that, I let my friend finish it. But for those who like their food healthy, this would be a good option, although they came with two little bun-like breads which I loved. For main course, my friend ordered a “Varennikhy” which was a dish of Russian dumplings with a mashed potato filling, topped with sour cream. It was quite tasty, although just a little bit bland – but still yum. I ordered a Chicken “Plov”, which is flavoured rice with chunks of chicken accompanied by a tomato puree. I loved it – the rice had a different and very nice flavor that was new to me, and it had big chunks of chicken. I enjoyed my meal! To go with it, I ordered a Sangria from their range of Mocktails – and it was so refreshing and yummy. It had a mix of green tea with orange, and was perfect for an afternoon lunch outside.

They also offered special Russian “souses” or sauces, to go with our dishes. My friend chose the “Gorchica” which was an extremely strong version of mustard sauce – it was super acidic. I chose the “Chesnochny” sauce which is a mayonnaise based garlic sauce, it was quite nice, but had a bit of an egg-y taste.

Chicken “Plov”

For dessert , we tried another authentic Russian dish, the “Blini”. We were recommended to try the pumpkin cheesecake, but my friend is a staunch vegetarian (not even egg) and they had no egg-less version of it, so we (I) had to let that go. Blini is basically a Russian style pancake (which could be made egg-less too), and they served it for us with a scoop of chocolate ice cream. Absolutely delicious, and very filling.

For all of this food, the bill was within a thousand rupees – so it’s a very reasonable place! The ambiance was lovely, the quantity was good, the flavours were new and exciting and the presentation of the dishes was spot on. All in all, quaint and comfy little place to go to, especially if you’re in the mood for something new, as the Russian food doesn’t disappoint!

The Bad Girls.

So I’ve been thinking. Why doesn’t Veronica (Deepika Padukone) from Cocktail get the guy in the end? Did that have something to do with Veronica being bold, brash, modern and very independent and Meera being more timid, mild and traditional? Well, to those who don’t want to read into it so much, and just go with the obvious – maybe it was just that Gautam (Saif Ali Khan) was genuinely in love with Meera, not Veronica. Well, that’s what I thought too – until I got around to thinking about other two-women-one-man movies.

Dil Toh Pagal Hai: Salwaar clad Pooja, skirt wearing Nisha

Let’s take DIl Toh Pagal Hai. We have Nisha (Karishma Kapoor), who is very forward, energetic, modern, and drinks, and we have Pooja (Madhuri Dixit), who is a little more withdrawn but friendly nevertheless and very traditional. Nisha wears jeans and tight tops, and skirts (I don’t think she ever wears any salwaars or such) while Pooja wears mostly salwaars, sarees and ghagras than jeans and tops. Who does Rahul (Shah Rukh Khan) fall for in the end? Pooja of course.

Jab Tak Hai Jaan: Meera with Samar

Jab Tak Hai Jaan: Akira with Samar

It’s almost like a hidden pattern I hadn’t noticed before. Take Jab Tak Hai Jaan. God-fearing, rather sheltered, mature Meera (Katrina Kaif) and the extremely loud, dominating, devil-may-care Akira (Anushka Sharma). Who does the guy fall for? Meera.

Ko: Renuka on the left, Saro on the right

And let’s not just make this Bollywood centeric. In the Tamil suspense thriller Ko, we have two different female characters – Saro (Piaa Bajpal) is again, very loud, wears mostly jeans and tees, is open with her feelings and frank while Renuka (Karthika Nair) is more traditional in her clothing most of the time and is more mature. No surprises as to whom the guy falls for. Renuka.

Kuch Kuch Hota Hai: Tina, Rahul and pre-tranformation Anjali

Kuch Kuch Hota Hain  is pretty much the biggest example of this. Rahul (Shah Rukh Khan) falls for Tina, the more held-together, mature, “womanly” one, and not Anjali, his tom-boyish, loud, effervescent best friend. You may argue, saying that the main focus of the movie was Rahul and Anjali’s love story – but you see, that’s the very thing that amuses me. Rahul only realizes his love for Anjali years later, when she has transformed into well, a long-haired, saree-wearing, bhajan-singing, woman of his dreams.

It’s funny how stereotypes creep into our everyday lives (especially in a country like ours), and in ways we don’t even realize. I wonder what such a pattern indicates. The man always falls for the traditional woman, the “womanly” woman, the woman who is definitely not loud and forward about her feelings. These are the chosen women. The “good girls”. Not Veronica or Nisha or Saro or the earlier version of Anjali. The bad girls?

Even the body language is different, and it’s funny that there is an idea that one is “preferred” over the other

I’m sorry, but I don’t think having short hair, or being loud or frank or modern or any of those qualities make a woman less womanly or less attractive. I don’t think women should change who they are, and suppress a more vibrant and colourful side of themselves just to make themselves more attractive to a man (or to another woman, whichever way you swing). Be loud, be enthusiastic, rock that short hair – it doesn’t make you less of a woman. Having said that, if you’re genuinely soft-spoken, have long hair, and traditional – that’s great too! I think women and men everywhere should embrace whoever they are, and not try and squeeze themselves into stereotypical shapes.

Of coffees and cliches : A Starbucks Opinion

Starbucks came to India only in the year 2013, which is just about a couple of years back. Bangalore was the fourth city in the country (after Mumbai, Delhi and Pune) to get a Starbucks outlet, and that was in November. So it’s safe to say, It’s been around in Bangalore for only a little more than a year.

My friend, being a major caffeine addict, made sure we all visited it as soon as possible – which we did. And besides, having seen and heard about it in movies and on TV shows, I was curious to see what the hype was all about. My cousin dismissed it by saying “it’s just another coffee shop, why the big fuss?” – and I honestly wanted to know the exact same thing.

The first time (we went to the outlet on M G Road), I had an iced mocha or some thing along those lines, but frankly, I didn’t like it – I found it too watery. It wasn’t a ‘blended’ drink, it was just ‘iced’ – which meant ice cubes floating around, diluting your drink even more (which is great if you like that sort of thing, but not for me).But. I did have a sip of my friend’s Signature Hot Chocolate – and that was honestly the best hot chocolate I’d ever had! The first thing that popped into my mind as it melted on my tongue was that it tasted like liquefied  Lindt chocolate bars! I am an absolute chocoholic, and it catered to my taste buds perfectly -and the Signature Hot Chocolate is now one of my favourite drinks there.

The Sadashivnagar outlet

I really liked my first visit to the place, despite my drink being so watery, because I loved the ambiance and the laid back aura about it. From my second visit, I learnt what to order according to my taste, and I discovered that they had a whole range of fabulous and tempting options to chose from. I had a Java chip Frappuccino, one of their best selling drinks, and I simply loved it. It was thick and cold, and slightly grainy with just  the right amount of choco chips blended into it. This led to several more visits with a friend of mine who has a caffeine addiction and shares my love for this place. We go to Starbucks when we want to study, or to satisfy cravings, or to just talk (and also: free wifi. Need I say more?) – and this has become all the more convenient now because of the new outlet that opened up super close to our college (in Sadashivnagar)! This one is spacious, comfortable, and filled with sunlight through out the day, the staff are friendly and the food is great as always -plus there’s always soothing jazz playing all day.

Raspberry Truffle Mocha ❤

I have tried quite a lot of drinks – some seasonal ones too, like the Christmas special, which was something with praline, and today, a Raspberry Truffle Mocha (which was delicious and smooth, even though the raspberry flavour was a little overpowering). Another drink I enjoy a lot is the Green Tea Frappuccino, which I tasted first because of my friend, who also happens to be quite health conscious (not that this is even remotely healthy – what with all that whipped cream, but well, it creates the illusion). It has that ever so slight bitter green tea flavour that goes so well with the whipped cream, and I love that!

The food at Starbucks is great too – the muffins are huge, the brownies are sweet, the sandwiches are loaded with chicken and veggies, the bread is soft – the only flaw is the exorbitantly priced desserts. The cakes are expensive, but I have tasted their cherry chocolate cake (during one of their free sample testings) and it was quite delicious.

The GreenTea Frappuccino! 😀

I’ve heard a whole lot of opinions on Starbucks – it seems to have garnered quite a lot of attention for a coffee shop – but that’s probably because it’s been a part of so many movies and TV shows and memes and all of that. Some love it (like me). Some pretend they love it – just to fit in I guess? Some think it’s alright. And then there are people who think it’s the cliche-est of all cliches, so over-hyped and not worth it at all.

Here’s my opinion: It’s true, Starbucks is pretty over-hyped. How ever, I find myself attracted to the place because I genuinely love the drinks and food they serve, and most of all, the general atmosphere of the place. And also, I LOVE their whipped cream(which I eat with a spoon because I’m a little weird), and that’s saying something because I don’t really like cream.The few of my friends who are Americans, and also those who have been to Starbucks abroad have told me that the outlets there are more like drive-bys – people get their drinks, and head out. There’s not much place to sit and work, like there is here, in India.

There are only two things I wish could be improved – the pricing of the food items and also the spelling skills of the staff (yes, the number of times my friends’ names have been contorted into something else is hilarious!). So, at the risk of sounding cliche, I’m going to go ahead and say, yes, I love Starbucks! It is a great place to catch up with friends, or to get work done or to simply enjoy some time by yourself. 🙂

It’s a Small World after all!

My friends and I love food and discovering new places to eat. In the last (almost) two years of college, we’ve been to quite a few places around Bangalore, and I thought, why not blog about it?

So here’s my first restaurant review/food/eating-out blog, in what I hope will be a series of many more to come. 🙂

Today, we went to a little place near Ulsoor Lake called Smalley’s. My friend had discovered it (you can visit her blog here: https://aldaloreenblog.wordpress.com/) and was dying to take us there, so we finally decided to see what it was all about.

As soon as I opened the door, I realized why it was called ‘Smally’s’. It’s a really really small place, but with three floors connected by a steep, narrow metal staircase. The interiors were done up in wooden tones- wooden tables and small stools, walls hung with quirky photographs, sayings and caricatures (yes, even one of Miley Cyrus with her infamous tongue out poses side by side with one of Narendra Modi wearing spectacles reflecting lotuses), and one of the walls was made of glass, giving a nice overview of the busy road below. Glass bottles and jars with lights in them hung suspended from the low ceiling (a really low ceiling, so you’ve got to watch your head!) made me think that the place would look really pretty in the evenings. There was nice music playing through out (some might complain about it being a tad bit too loud, but we were fine with that).

The interiors at the first floor at Smalley’s

Since we went at a rather odd time – around three o clock in the afternoon – the place was a bit empty, and the third floor was not open yet. We chose a comfortable corner spot away from the huge glass wall, near some stray square cushions, and brushed through the menu. The place had pretty much everything – from steaks to salads, pizza, lasagna, pasta, burgers and even dishes like ‘Mangalorean chicken curry and rice’, for those who were in the mood for that.

We started off with something called ‘Lord of the Wings’ – basically, spicy chicken wings with a cooling dip. It came quite quickly, and was finished even more quickly, on account of us being very hungry, and it being super delicious. We only remembered to take a photo of the chicken wings after the plate was empty, hence no photo. The chicken was soft and juicy with a nice spicy and crispy marination. The mayo and garlic dip complimented it perfectly. The only qualms we had was that the quantity was a little less – five wings.

Macaroni with chicken and fusilli with chicken

For our main course, we ordered Chicken macaroni and chicken fusilli pastas (which arrived much, much earlier than the rest of the order) and two chicken lasagnas. The fusili pasta was cheesy and creamy, and really wonderful with big chunks of chicken. The macaroni was spicy and full of flavour, also with big chunks of chicken. The lasagnas looked quite small, but turned out to be satisfyingly filling, and very yummy indeed.

chicken lasagna

the already-dug-into New York baked cheesecake with blueberry topping

For dessert, we had Walnut brownies with marshmallows, chocolate sauce and vanilla ice cream as well as New York baked cheesecake. Both were delicious – the marshmellows oozed out of the chocolatey brownies and the cheesecake was dense but melt-in-the-mouth, with a generous layer of blueberry topping (without which, it would not have tasted as good as it did) . While the brownies were enough to satisfy two people, the slice of cheesecake was quite small – also, for those who prefer more airy, light kinds, this is not for you (I like my cheesecakes slightly dense and thick).

brownies, marshmallows, chocolate sauce, vanilla ice cream and all sorts of goodness!

We thoroughly enjoyed the lunch – made even more enjoyable perhaps, because we were so darned hungry when we came. The place was comfortable, the service was good, the food looked really appetizing and tasted great – plus, it was light on our pockets too (it was all under thousand five hundred rupees)! We’ll definitely be visiting Smalley’s again. 😀

Smally’s Resto Bar:

Address: LG09, Sky Walk 5/1, Assaye Road, Bengaluru, Karnataka 560008

Phone:074067 62559

Open from 11 am to 11 pm

For all of India’s Daughters.

Yesterday, the BBC released a documentary film recording the events of the gang rape of a young girl that happened on the 16th of December, 2012, in India’s national capital, Delhi. It included never-before-seen interviews with the victim’s parents as well as the rapists’ family and friends. It also included the mass protests that shook the country after the incident. They called this documentary ‘India’s Daughter’.

Today, the government of India banned the documentary, declaring it “a very sensitive issue” – only increasing the public attention it had been receiving.

 

As I watched the documentary, I went through a series of emotions – mostly anger, disgust and then finally, heart break (which I did not expect). Predominantly, I felt a rage – an explicit, murderous and infuriating rage – at the people who did those inhuman things to her and more so, the people who had the audacity and the sick mentality to actually support and justify such atrocities. It was a gang rape, a brutal, heinous crime against a young girl, a college student. It was so barbaric that the organs in her body were destroyed, never to recover again. Her intestines trailed out of her, she was beaten and bitten, and had an iron rod thrust into her. After this treatment, she was thrown out, naked and bleeding, along with her friend (who was also battered and bruised), on the roadside. Even the most dangerous criminals have not been subject to such barbaric acts for their crimes of murder, trafficking, robbery – but it is an absolutely fitting and deserving punishment for a girl who is out late in the night, to watch a movie with a male friend. How, I repeat – HOW – and in which sick, twisted universe is this justified? Why would anyone try and justify something like this?

And no – do not bring in Indian “culture”. Like Chimamanda Adiche said, “Culture does not make people. People make culture.” It is people like these, who blame “culture” for obviously wrong things, that defile our country’s culture. Culture is constantly changing. Going out at a certain time of the day or night, being able to wear what one wants, and being with members of the opposite sex is not  a crime. Trying to curb that, or even something as atrocious as justifying rape for something like that – it just boggles my mind, the immense and utter stupidity of it all. Words cannot describe my infinite disgust and fury towards the narrow-minded mentality of the two lawyers who defended the rapists – who, in the first place, had admitted to their crimes. The two lawyers seem to be of a different, and what seems to be a more misogynous frame of mind – one of them even claiming that he would punish his sister or daughter if she ever had a pre-marital sexual relationship by burning them alive. The shocking truth is that such mentality does run through the minds of a scarily large number of people, and it is this that is the ultimate enemy. What’s more disturbing is that it runs through the minds of women as well!

I had decided, half-way through the documentary, that this would be an angry blog post, a rant, a vent for my anger. But I never thought I’d be left feeling so broken-hearted, so drained of all the fury, at the end. The last words Jyothi (the victim) said to her mother, before she succumbed to her brutal injuries in the hospital were – “Sorry Mummy. I gave you so much trouble. I am sorry.” More than anything else, this shattered me into a thousand pieces, because at that moment I realized that that would’ve been the exact same thing I would have wanted to tell my own mother, had I been in that position. And I knew this truth, deep in my heart, because I am an Indian girl, and it would take more than an education and the most amazing parents in the world to rid me of the guilt of feeling like a burden.

Jyothi felt guilty – even after watching an entire nation stand up for her, and fight for her and give her the title “Nirbhaya” (which mean “the brave one” or “without fear” or “courageous”) – she felt guilty for all the trouble she had caused. Only except, it wasn’t she who caused all this trouble, it was the group of men who decided to rape her.

And this exactly is the ultimate enemy.

Rape is not the fault of the victim. It is the fault of the rapist. Even after the number of times this has been said, it still has not sunk into the mindsets of people yet. Only when that happens, will there be any semblance of change in the country. And right now, change is what this country desperately needs.

The Penis in Public.

One of my friends once said, “It’s funny how in India it’s okay to piss in public, but not okay to kiss in public.” And that, I feel, is Indian mentality summed up in just one sentence. A movement like the Kiss of Love campaign (in which people gather on the streets and kiss each other) received a raging, vehement opposition from people claiming “it isn’t part of Indian culture” – while something like, oh I don’t know, whipping your dick out in public and urinating is just considered normal – for both the people who do it, and the people who see it. For example, if you’re going someplace by an autorickshaw (or any vehicle for that matter) in almost any part of India, this would be your typical view – cars, buses, scooters, bikes, the occasional cycle, pedestrians, shops, trees, a man peeing, others not bothering, you know, that sort of thing.

So a couple of days ago, my cousin and uncle left me to wait in the car while they got out to get something. The car was parked in front of a compound wall. In that short span of about ten minutes, five men – five – stopped to urinate in front of that wall, one after the other. Yes, I counted, because it amused and shocked me – like there was some invisible sign that read “Public Toilet”, that only men could read, one after the other stopped there to urinate.  And there I was, in my front row seat, trying to look anywhere but there, trying to think about cupcakes and puppies to distract myself from those utterly disgusting men with zero sense of self-respect (but to no avail). The feeling that completely engulfed me was revulsion – what have we come to? Isn’t it shameful? How is it that a girl wearing shorts receives disapproving, judgemental glares for showing her legs in public, but a man doesn’t, for showing his penis (even if it was just for a couple of minutes – for those who want to argue about the time factor)? It is a public place, a main road, for screaming out loud!

As it got harder and harder to ignore the idiots who came to relieve themselves thus publicly, I wondered if I should get out and make my presence known – would they be too embarrassed to continue? Or maybe I could imitate the girl in that YouTube video and sit down and pretend to pee next to them – to give them a taste of their own medicine and see how they react to that. Or maybe I could roll down my window and yell at them to stop?

And I’m ashamed, because I did none of those things. I just sat there, repulsed, angry and frustrated with myself, for not doing anything to stop it. I was alone, my cousin and uncle were nowhere in sight, and it wasn’t even a familiar place. There could be the positive reaction, the dream reaction, if you will – they would stop, be embarrassed, learn their lesson and be so consumed with shame that they would never pee in public again. And then there could be the negative reaction – this ranged from them ignoring me to eve teasing to flashing to maybe even rape, who knew?  Which is why I thought a billion times about doing anything to stop it. And finally didn’t.

And so the problem persists, because the people who do it, do it. And the people who see it, just see it. Nobody stops it. I think its time we all woke up to this. Peeing in public is not only disrespectful to yourself and the others around you, it reflects poor character, self-control and a total lack of hygiene. If you are someone who does this – be ashamed of yourself, and never do it again. If you are someone who has seen it, but not raised your voice against it (like me) – make sure you try to next time.